Just ’cause I’m feeling slightly pissy

People that talk baby talk to babies should be shaken.

Pacifier, not passy. How do you expect Billy Bob, Jr. to ever learn to talk right if you’re talking to him like a moron?

People that talk baby talk to other adults should be shaken harder.

If you refer to your child’s pacifier as a passy to an innocent adult bystander, you’re lacking in gray matter.

People that talk baby talk to the elderly…

…well, they should be taken out back and have the tar beaten out of them or just shot.  Seriously, they’re not worth the effort to beat.

Old people are NOT idiots, dammit.  They don’t need to be talked down to, treated like babies and talked to like they’re imbeciles.

They’re old, not stupid.  They can still smell this particular brand of bullshit from 5 miles away.

Don’t ask me why this pisses me off so much, but it always has.  Maybe it was because I was actually repulsed as a child when folks tried to talk to me that way.  I remember Mama saying when I was not quite 2 that I asked a woman in the grocery store, “Ma’am, what’s your problem?” and when she questioned what was I talking about, I answered with, “Well, you are talking funny.”.  She’d oohed & ahed over what a “cutsie tootsie” I was.  Lady, I was talking in complete sentences before I was 2.  I was writing in cursive before I was 4.  I was NOT a cutsie-tootsie.  >.<

Maybe it’s because I want to puke when I hear my classmates talking to a 90 year old lady, with her faculties intact, saying “There, there sweet haw-uuuuut (southern for sweet heart).  It’ll be alright.” in that same sing-song, baby talk voice.

It isn’t cute, it isn’t funny and it damned sure isn’t appreciated by any of the white-haired folks I know, so if you’re guilty of doing it, STOP IT!

Before a band of old folks gangs up on you and slaps a diaper on your ass & shoves a “passy” in your mouth.



6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Glenn Mark Cassel
    May 22, 2010 @ 02:29:35

    Well I think you’re a cutsie tootsie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 8)

  2. Linda
    May 22, 2010 @ 10:11:50

    Truer words have never been typed! I hate it when someone in the nursing home speaks to the residents like they have never had a coherent thought. The memories these people could share!

    I have a friend who spoke baby talk to her only son. He is in his 30’s now, and still has a problem with his speech. He sounds like his mom when she spoke to him.

    My kids have all stated that they are so glad we never spoke to them in ‘baby talk.’ My 3 y/o granddaughter says ‘baby talk’ is for babies, and she isn’t a baby! No one ever spoke to her in ‘baby talk’…at least as far as I know. She’s been very prolific in her speech and her hand work! Not writing in cursive yet, but spelling at a 2nd grade level! (Mom home-schools the older ones…3 older and new one due in Juned)

  3. snigsspot
    May 22, 2010 @ 10:31:48

    She had me beat. I couldn’t spell for love nor money. Still can’t, but I’m good with a dictionary at least.


  4. Rho
    May 22, 2010 @ 12:39:11

    I never talked baby talk to my children or any babies when I was working in a Maternal/Infant unit. I never saw the point.

  5. Crucis
    May 22, 2010 @ 12:50:39

    Likely that “passy” will get shoved up another orifice.

    I had a PA start that on me when I visited a new doc (orthopedist.) I asked her if she was an idiot or did she work at it and walked out. I called the doc and told him my experience and that I’d be seeing a different doc.

    I never got a response from him, so good riddance.

  6. Bob Perrow
    May 22, 2010 @ 17:40:35


    Why don’t you tell us how you REALLY feel???

    Bob Perrow

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