Stream of consciousness writing

I thought this might cure the momentary case of writer’s block…I was wrong.  My mind doesn’t seem to have a stream of consciousness today.

That is damned scary.

Have all the thoughts just fell out of my head somewhere?  Should someone be watching where they step just incase?

Whoa!  Thought alert.  After taking a swig of drink, my mind just told me Sam’s Diet Cola tastes better than Diet Coke.

Waiting for another thought now.  Tap toes, drum fingers, whistle out of tune.  Umm…yeah…still nothing.

I wonder if Sam’s Diet Cola kills thoughts?  Now see, I didn’t even realize I’d thought it until it was over and done.  This is interesting.

As interesting as watching paint dry and grass grow.  I refuse to think about grass even if it means I won’t think at all…it’s too hot to cut grass and I know if I look out the window, I’ll see it needs to be cut and then I’ll start feeling all guilty that I’m not getting up and going out to cut it and oh man, I don’t want to think guilty thoughts, so no thinking of grass.

Ok, back in non-grass-thinking coasting gear.  Ahh, to coast is divine.

I have a turkey in the freezer.  It would feed about 12 I imagine.  Mama’s birthday is in 2 weeks.  I wonder if she’d kill me if I invited her closest cousins and threw her a birthday dinner.  She’s strange like that.  I wanted to have she and my dad a 50th wedding anniversary party, but she said she wouldn’t come if I did…  She can be an ornery ol’ heifer.

Heifer…steak…sounds like a plan for supper tomorrow night.

Ouch!  Strange little burning pain in the right pinky toe.  Felt like an ant bite.  Now, I must leave the thought-writing process and crawl in the floor to make sure there are no ants.

No ants.  No uncles either.  Oh dear Lord.  I make corny jokes when I’m talking to myself.  I wonder if that means I need to see a shrink?

Check the calendar to see if I remembered to write down when to color my hair again.  Nope.  Took me 2 solid minutes to figure out when I colored it last and it was just last Wednesday!  Must be the Sam’s Diet Cola.  Read Cola ingredients.  What is naturally flavored like cola?  It says it has natural flavor.  WTF “naturally” tastes like cola?  Beets?  No.  I hate beets.  Alfalfa?  Ick.  Brussel sprouts?  Barf.

My foot is the same size as my 11 year old daughter.  Didn’t expect that thought did you?  Heh, neither did I.

I wonder where the 35mg of sodium comes from in this drink.  Carbonated water, caramel color, phosphoric acid (I can’t believe that is good for me), potassium benzoate…Hey!  Isn’t benzoate something in Clearsil or one of those acne products?  Yu-uck.

I think I’ll just fish the ice out of my drink and eat it.  Better for me.  Trying to catch ice cubes with your tongue is interesting.  Helps that I have a long tongue.  The husband said I would have made a damned fine lesbian with a long tongue like that.  I’m trying to remember what I hit him with when he said that…

Molly’s dog wants to eat, so it’s time for me to quit consciously trying to think and move back to unconsciously doing the Domestic Drudgery Duties…

Looking back over what I’ve typed, it’s clear to see I have no useful thoughts today.

Maybe tomorrow…or next week.

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8 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Alaina Readman
    Aug 03, 2008 @ 23:24:30

    You’re hilarious! I’m glad to know other people have a tough time coming up with stuff to write too… and that their thought process is as screwed up as mine. Here’s to a amazing post about nothing. 🙂

  2. RT
    Aug 04, 2008 @ 00:48:25

    Funnnnneeeeeeee!!!!

    I haven’t much use for my brain right now. Feels good. 🙂

  3. Old NFO
    Aug 04, 2008 @ 01:13:00

    Heh… good ‘stream of consciousness’ 🙂

  4. Celery
    Aug 04, 2008 @ 01:59:59

    I feel your… lack of thoughts too. My brain is completely empty at the moment, except for messed up memories and Beethoven’s Fifth.

  5. snigsspot
    Aug 04, 2008 @ 03:30:49

    I need to have the computer plugged in when I lie down to go to sleep. THAT is when 5 gazillion totally unrelated strange thoughts pop into my head. Make it 5 gazillion plus 1 if the husband has already gone to sleep and is snoring loud enough to wake the dead. 😉

  6. USA_Admiral
    Aug 04, 2008 @ 13:48:46

    That was some stream you got there. Ice cubes and tongue thing was funny.

  7. Trackback: How I roll « RT’s Ponderings
  8. allrtee
    Aug 05, 2008 @ 02:15:08

    Wow…did wordpress do that for me without me doing it?

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