FFS Part 934837

My boss has made my damned head nearly explode.

The thing he’s the least likely to understand is he came close to having his own exploded for him.

More later.

Oh and I’m pretty sure I have road rash on my butt.

More on that later too.

Ah, the butt-

The van, she died…transmission said Kaflooie on youie.  Enter my father to the rescue- as usual.  He brought me his pick-up.  Nice Dodge Ram BUT

today he needed it to haul the trailer to town so, I had to trade the wonderful truck for the Little Red Rocket.

Dad got the LRR to drive back and forth to work when he was driving a school bus.  He had to leave his vehicle there at the bus shop, on the “wrong” side of town, so he wanted something not-so-nice.  He found The LRR for $200.  A little Mazda ### (I don’t remember the numbers).  It’s bright red and has had a run in with a deer, or maybe two.  One headlight is gone (so it’s a sunshiny day only car), the hood is tied down with a bungee cord.  There’s a crack in the windshield that looks like Dr. Frankenstein tried to sew it up (on the passenger side, so it’s not an “illegal” crack).  No a/c.  No radio.  No power locks, windows and no cruise control.

No t.v., no DVD player and no bed.

BUT-

It runs like a rabbit on speed, hence the name.

However, I’m used to riding and looking down at the vehicles around me.  Today, I was looking at bumpers.  I swear it felt like my butt was on the ground, so that’s why I’m wondering if I’ve got road rash on my assh.  Heh.

I told Daddy tonight, when we traded again, that I had a suggestion.  Cut a hole in the roof and put a periscope in where you could see over anthills.

He said I was ungrateful. 

As to the doc and I going a round or two, I had to use the intimidation of my height against him.  Then, when he realized he was whipped no matter which way he went, he spent the rest of the afternoon sucking up to me.  Told me my hair looked extra good today, offered me some tomatoes, and closed the office early and let us go home.

If you’re going to have a Little Man Syndrome Temper Tantrum, don’t do it around me.